Is the UK a safe place to be Transgender in 2018?

I know from some recent Stonewall research just how bad things are, if you are trying to get on with your life as a transgender person in Britain today. 

It is known that in the last twelve months, two in five trans people have experienced a hate crime or incident. I know because I was one of the statistics of an unsolved hate crime against me, while simply doing my weekly shopping in the town where I live.

Every day in the UK, transgender people continue to be mocked, excluded, bullied and attacked, simply for existing. I have personally tried with all my heart to make a successful transition, but at the moment I have real doubts on it being successful and I am now even considering de-transitioning on the grounds of my safety. (More on that in a future blog)

Now, other countries are openly agreeing that Britain is in fact an unsafe place for transgender people. How can that be? We were leading the world at one stage on transgender recognition and rights. But the other year, a tribunal in New Zealand granted asylum to a transgender woman from Britain on the basis that her life would be in danger if she returned to the UK.

This should by all rights be considered a national embarrassment, that this is where the UK is on it’s LGBT rights and acceptance.We simply cannot continue to call ourselves a world-leader in LGBT-inclusion, nor a beacon of equality for diverse communities.

It sadly appears that many of our mainstream media from newspaper articles to general social media all seem to have gone to the Donald Trump school of non common-sense.  I think they have in fact even stepped up a gear, over recent months in their attempts to make all the vile transphobia acceptable, even questioning the right of transgender people to even exist in their world.

We must make sure that this isn't something that is ever going to be open for debate, as doing so is giving the go ahead to these messages, that has a very real and devastating real-world consequences for transgender people who just want to live their lives.

Many trans people feel unable to be themselves because of this treatment, whether at work, using public transport or even just shopping for groceries.

Its sad new to hear that the woman recently granted asylum in New Zealand told the courts that she would have to wait until late night to shop for her essentials in Britain. I know we have started to do the similar I don’t thing of going shopping until 8:30pm  or 9pm on a quiet Monday evening. The woman did this so she would be around as few people as possible, because she felt too afraid and unsafe to be herself in public, which is how, I feel nowadays in the UK.

It appears that transphobia in Britain filters down into our children in the UK schools too.We have research that shows almost half of under 18 year old transgender people have attempted suicide, yet in the schools just two in five of the teachers condemn transphobic bullying which is very sad news.

I have read that towards the end of 2017, the government is planning to have a public consultation on reforming the Gender Recognition Act, which if done correctly has the potential to transform the current very invasive and bureaucratic system that governs how transgender people get legal recognition of their new gender. 

As a nation we cannot allow Britain to continue to be an unsafe place for transgender people its currently a unwelcoming and frightening place for transgender people to live work or play. The situation we are in today is totally shameful and avoidable. I only hope the up coming changes to the Gender Recognition Act will be a catalyst for a total change in the publics attitude to transgender people in the UK

Transgender Depression

Being out as a Transgender person is not an easy decision to make we all know that don't we some have a very difficult time others just appear to cope or do they? 

As a transgender person we face prejudice, insults and hate crime nearly every time we open the front door and venture out into the world around us. It's not surprising so many Transgender people are seen to suffer depression and mental health issues, if the general public had to live under the daily stress we have to function under they would suffer similar feelings 

Also not everyone is able or wants to transition…

This is a perfectly valid choice for people to make.  However these individuals must learn to cope with the tension that the gender dysphoria produces.  Sometimes this can be helped by having times when one can cross-dress, interact with others who are aware of one’s status, talk about the issue, and take low-levels of hormones (that don’t effect the body outwardly).

Other mental health issues not related to being transgender. Just because someone is transgender doesn’t mean they don’t have other issues in their lives.  It can be hard for some people to let themselves seek treatment for other issues when the gender dysphoria is so prominent a concern.

After two plus years of being finally me, I succumbed to the dreaded depression I had read so much about, my mental health was at a all time low. I became basically house bound and actively avoided going out with my partner (wife) to the shops or out socialising, so I knew I needed some medical help.

My normal gender friendly doctor at my surgery has left to practice overseas in Australia so there's no chance in moving surgery or country come to think of it, so I just booked in with the first available doctor at the surgery, by good luck or fate the doctor is Trans aware, and has other patients who are transgender. She immediately checked my past blood tests and just spoke to me on how I was feeling, which was the opening for me to discuss how I was feeling and what state I felt I was in. She listened and researched possible medication suitable for me.

The Doctor explained how long the medication would take to start to make a difference to my mood and feelings and she was spot on. Two months on I'm feeling much better and I have started to live again and regularly go out and about shopping and enjoying my time. I have recently been for interviews for different jobs and facing the world, after my old employer decided to close the place I worked at and concentrate on their main site. Sometimes you need that kick in the pants to refocus and start doing something different, it is that time for me.

Mental health is no secret and should be talked about openly, we all have periods in out lives that come under the mental health banner there is no shame in asking for medical help. In just a short period of time you can go from a depressed state to your old self, enjoying life and all it has to offer.

So if your reading this and feel depressed about your gender then please seek help and advice.

In the UK you can contact any of the links below to talk to someone.

Click here for Transgender support-organisations and here gender-identity-support-UK

There is also uktransinfo on facebook
www.facebook.com/groups/uktransinfo  
Email: info@uktrans.info

General support

Samaritans

Call 116 123 

Email jo@samaritans.org

Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM) - for men

Call 0800 58 58 58 – 5pm to midnight every day 

Visit the webchat page

Papyrus – for people under 35 

Call 0800 068 41 41 – Monday to Friday 10am to 10pm, weekends 2pm to 10pm, bank holidays 2pm to 5pm 

Text 07786 209697 

Email pat@papyrus-uk.org

laser hair removal update.

The laser hair removal was... well lacking would be the best word, it retarded the hair growth of the dark hairs but it failed to kill all of them off. So here I am looking in the mirror seeing the same old stubble every morning it's so unfair, but that's life.


My next move is to go for electrolysis which by all accounts hurts like heck and costs a bucket load of cash, The NHS England's list of approved electrolysis technicians and salons appears to sparse on the ground in my area, plenty in the larger cities and even some large towns but for me I will have to travel to get beard removal by this method.


My understanding of the process is an electric current is applied using a very fine needle-shaped electrode or metal probe into each hair follicle with the mission to destroy the hair's root.

It all sounds easily enough but hair grows in different stages: growing, resting and shedding. Because all of the hair isn't on the same stage at any given time, multiple sessions are needed to get to the hair removed stage. So in theory each 1" of skin area may or may not need 3 treatments to give you a smooth as a baby's bottom face. now to me that's expensive on the pocket and second sound like a lot of pain spread over quite a while. (If anybody reading this has gone through this treatment please leave me a comment in the section below and let me know how it is going or how good it is at removing face hair.)

Well I have now been to a specialist electrolysis hair removing clinic, and I can confirm it was painful without the anaesthetic cream, so when I book in to have the treatment I will have applied the anaesthetic cream in advance. I'm currently waiting for a NHS England white paper looking at the time that is currently funded by the NHS for electrolysis treatment before I commit to starting the beard removal as in the past is not applied to past persons, so you can lose out on the newer number of treatments the NHS will fund.

I remember reading about a transfemale saying to get the beard stubble started first and after living in role for over 2 years, I can now see what she was getting at. So I recommend anyone reading this blog, to look at beard removal early on as razor burn on your neck is a dead give away every day.

As soon as I start electrolysis treatment I will post updates to this page.